I think this really could see an end to flopping. Think about it; players won’t want to keep shelling out money just to shoot some free throws. In turn, they would become less inclined to flop. Now, this may also increase the number of athletes who go broke. But who cares! That’s part of the fun! For example, if a low level player ends up getting fouled a lot throughout the course of a season and runs out of money, he would have to file for free throw line bankruptcy! Such an instance would then be followed up by free throw line court. This is where the mascot plays the part of the judge and the player would get a free throw line lawyer that can either be a clown, a cheerleader, or Peter Dinklage. And after that happens the mascot would throw a pie at him, he would have to leave the game, sell his house, get divorced, and eventually become a depressed middle school PE teacher. Family fun at its finest!
So, if you’re reading this Adam Silver. First, thanks a lot for reading my article I really appreciate it! And I really do enjoy your bald head. Anyway, please consider adopting my proposal for ending flopping; I think it would improve the game drastically and would make you and your awesome bald head a lot more of cash.
Steven Peeler is a 19 years old from Portland, Oregon. He enjoys washed up country singers, old VHS tapes, and the number 78. Follow him on Twitter.